It will probably take me longer to write this review than it did for me to beat Super Blue Boy Planet. Unfortunately, that’s mostly because it’s a huge pain in the ass finding something to talk about. Part of me just wants to say “It’s free, fun, and only lasts an hour, so fuck the review, just give it a try.” But alas, I’m tied down by “professional obligation” and “fear of what Cathy and Elijah might do to me if I tried something that incredibly stupid”. Truly none have ever suffered as much as I have. Honestly, at this point, I suggest taking bets on how long I go before making an Eiffel 65 or Derek Jarman reference in a last-ditch effort to have something to say.

Okay, review time: in Super Blue Boy Planet you.. run to the right and jump. Once, you even move to the left and jump! WHOOOOOOOOO, that’s some next-level platforming action right there. And get this, if you hold the “jump button” the character flies a little bit! Okay, my snark aside, Blue here doesn’t do anything you haven’t seen before, but it does it well. Yeah, I wish it was a little more challenging and yeah, it’s almost more a proof of concept rather than a full game. But at the low price of “not a damn thing” and an hour of your time, you could do worse.

I’m really looking forward to the Devs next project: Super RED Boy Planet: The tale of Blue’s long-lost Communist Brother. You know what, never mind. Spin-offs never work.

Well, I guess that’s it. See you next time.

headerSuper Blue Boy Planet was Developed by...

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIT! I just thought of something interesting to talk about.

So, my last review was for Rise & Shine, whose narrative crutch was about the player character’s new-found ability to respawn. Well, Super Blue Boy Planet uses the same core idea, but does more with it. No, I’m not going to do a full compare and contrast here, go read my other review, ya lazy fuck. Plus I tried, and it almost ruined one of the puzzles so… you know… spoilers and shit. What I will say is that once the mechanic is introduced, the game makes a good use of it. Especially when combined with the momentum-based flight.

Aaaaaaaaaaand… that’s it. But, because I am contractually obligated to end on a joke, here’s a blatant non sequitur: Whats the cheapest kind of meat? Deer Balls – they’re under a Buck.

headerSuper Blue Boy Planet was Developed by Tuwi Michael Nannings
Point of sale: Steam

the-sealSuper Blue Boy Planet is Free to Play; maybe I wasn’t too far off with that communist crack.

A Review Copy was downloaded free of charge. I don’t know how many more ways I can tell you the game is free.